In the Company of Men: A Guide to Ya Brista’s Favorite Sex Clubs

A young Padawan is driving down 14^th Street with his family. 25 years from now, the streets will be lined with coffee shops, needlessly expensive furniture stores, and hipsters, but right now, it is lined with adult bookstores. The young Padawan takes particular note of the Olympia bathhouse and makes plans to come back to conduct further “research” when he is unaccompanied by parental units. A year later, the young Padawan returns and goes into his first adult bookstore, gets a couple of tokens, and goes into a booth. For the first time, he sees two men fucking and explodes all over the screen.

That young padawan was Ya Brista, and it was the beginning of a lifelong love affair with Sex Clubs. For a Gay of a Certain Age, the smell of Pine Sol and Chlorox gets our dicks rock hard and brings back memories of hours spent…

… in the company of men.

For many young gays like Ya Brista, some of our first sexual experiences were at these establishments, where, for the price of a few tokens, you could while away the hours. Once I turned 21, a new world opened to me: the Sex Club. These Dens of Iniquity became a place for more than just sex, they became hangout spots, a place where gay, bisexual and straightish men live the freest expression of their sexual being. Sadly, in the age of Grindr, Adam4Adam, and Facebook, the sex club is a vanishing presence on the gay landscape, but it is in praise of these unabashed temples of sex that I present this list of my favorite sex clubs.

Mount Morris, Harlem, NY

Ahh, the Good Old Days

The first time I made it to Mount Morris, I just about lost my mind. It was a placed filled with all of the beautiful Black and Latino men that continues to make NYC one of my favorite destinations on the entire planet. There was sucking in the dry sauna, fucking in the wet sauna, and all manner of moaning and groaning and shrieks coming from the booths. Although it was far from its heyday when I first visited, Mt. Morris still had plenty of beautiful people doing beautiful things.

Friends of mine used to wonder why I was always so down to head up to NYC, and now you know why. In addition to the clubs, the music, the food, the shopping, and the culture, I was also there for the

Alas! It is gone now!Slammer (Fort Lauderdale and Los Angeles)

If Sodom had a basement, it would be Slammer Fort Lauderdale. Although the place has lots of booths, even some equipped with a swing, the real action happens in the orgy room. Slammers is the only place I’ve been to where men don’t even bother to go into the booths. There’s a huge padded platform where everyone just fucks right out in the open. It’s a porno come to life. If someone catches your eye, and you catch his, he just drops his pants right there!

For the more discreet among us, there are booths and while those stay full, Slammers is a place designed for MEN to have sex with MEN in front of other MEN. Besides sweetie, you’re at a fucking sex club. It’s a bit too late for the Paulina Pure Pussy shit.

If Gomorrah had a back porch, it would be Slammer LA. It’s a wee bit more restrained than the Fort Lauderdale version, but that’s not saying much. Although there isn’t the huge orgy room, the LA version features a piss room,

where men lie in clawfoot tubs and wait to drink from the tap. The room smells like the filthiest of truck stops, but for a certain kind of men, that’s a good thing.

One thing that both Fort Lauderdale and LA have in common is the dark room. This purposely small space has no lights, with the only illumination coming from the open doorway, and the occasional shady kween who shines her phones screen to call people out. This is where the Pass Around Party Bottoms, like your friend from IML, spend all of their time. Facedown, ass up, they lie in wait for wandering anonymous dicks to slide in. There’s no pretense, no “let me suck your dick”, just holes waiting to be filled with semen.

Although I have had fun at all of these places, there is one place that holds a special place at the tip of my dick…

Glorious Health Club, Washington, DC (aka The Gloryhole)

There was a time the Gloryhole was famous (or infamous) among a certain set. Coming to DC for Memorial Day meant three things: dancing all night at the Edge, getting worked up over the dicks and asses hanging out at the Wet, and then fucking at the Gloryhole until well past dawn, after which everyone went to IHOP and pretended like they hadn’t spent all night whoring around.

The Gloryhole was a meeting spot where people came to hang out. There were the shady kids who thought they were better than everyone else because they only hung out on the street and never went in. All they ever did was keekee and look at trade all night in mock indignation.

I never really got to know any of those hoes. Then there were those like me, who came every weekend for the excitement that comes with fucking random dudes, and you couldn’t do that in the parking lot.

Inside, there were two sides. On the left was an adult bookstore where you dropped tokens. On the right was a large open space with booths and partitions. There were all flavors of men there and in seemingly endless supply. Although there was lots of sex going on, people also just came to hang out. I actually met a couple of my good bristas there, as well as my Gay Mama.

The original location is no more, and although it is in a new location, the magic is gone. Even on a busy night, the place is mostly empty (so I’ve heard, LOL), except for the dark room, and even then, it’s mostly looky-loos standing around waiting for the few Pass Around Party Bottoms to turn their ass in the right direction.

Le Sigh…

Speaking of getting stuffed, next week is Thanksgiving, and we will discuss the things that Ya Brista is thankful for. In the meantime, hit me back and tell me about some of your favorite sex clubs and feel free to provide graphic details and pics of your adventures. You can reach me here, Facebook, Twitter, or Tumblr.

You can also catch me every Thursday @ 8pm eastern, co-hosting the Reali-TEA Radio Show on PapiChuloRADIO.com.

Also I am pleased to debut the first story in the Alex and Alonzo Series. Alex and Alonzo: A Love Story is the tale of two men who meet on the subway one night and feel that instant attraction. What starts as a single night of kinky eroticism turns into a love story full of twists and turns that neither of them expects. The First Night is the tale of the night Alex and Alonzo meet, and gives the reader peak into the world of two men who connect on a very deep, primally sexual level.

Available on amazon.com for the Kindle and the Kindle App for all tablets and smartphones, including iphones, iPads, Android devices, Nooks, and Blackberrys.